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Let’s crunch numbers, shall we? No, not field goal percentages and defensive efficiencies. The numbers you’ll see more often than any other. We’re talking laundry statistics, i.e. the numbers on the back of jerseys. We’ve got a couple of new players who definitely had the opportunity to get a new representative digit. When Tyreke Evans sat in that big room across the table from the team seamstress, what did he say? When Jrue Holiday first got off the plane in New Orleans after the trade, did he know? What goes through the mind of the players when choosing their jersey number? We don’t have the answer to that, but we can speculate about all kinds of other fun stuff.

 

Tyreke Evans

In the (popular?) music video for “I am #1” by St. Louis rapper, Nelly, he proudly claims that “Two is not a winner and nobody remembers third.” He could be talking about this number 2. And what if nobody remembers you either, number 3. (Note that the first shot of Nelly in this music video is him wearing a #4 jersey)

Number one is a bold move, Tyreke. But we like that about you. We like how open minded you seem to be about your role with the team. We like that you won Rookie of the Year. We like that Sacramento had the best odds to win the #1 overall pick and they slide to #4 but they still landed you. We like that James Harden was in your draft class and that maybe you want to outshine him. We’re all gearing up for a grueling rivalry with Houston (partially because they call themselves Crawfish Town but whatever) and we’re happy you’re a part of that. Be our James Harden (OKC version, assuming you come off the bench). Or, be our James Harden (HTOWN version, assuming Eric Gordon gets traded and you start).

Competition for #1 in our Hearts: Baron Davis, Trevor Ariza, Chris Andersen

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  Jrue Holiday

It’s understandable why Al-Farouq Aminu chose to switch to #0 from #3. He was part of the Chris Paul trade and perhaps most importantly, he is not Chris Paul. Jrue Holiday isn’t Chris Paul either – but he is the point guard of the future and it’s safe to say that New Orleans is ready to have a high quality point guard that will keep the same jersey on for at least the next half decade. Jrue could have gone with #3 and I don’t think we would have blinked.

However, Jrue decided to keep #11 – perhaps because he wanted to stay on the same path he was on in Philadelphia. He was an All-Star, everybody, and I don’t care that Derrick Rose was injured. Somebody had to make the All-Star team and it was Jrue. Wouldn’t it be weirder if he didn’t make it?

We like you, Jrue. A lot. We’re not worried about Nerlens Noel becoming a permanent “What If”. We’re excited about you running the squadron. We’re thrilled you were a part of the jersey reveal. We love that muscle flex. See you at All-Star 2014. Chris Paul will see you too. From the bench.

Competition for #11 in our hearts: Doug Overton, David Anderson, Jerome Dyson, Larry Brown (what up Bucs!)

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In honor of column #7, the number 7 and jersey numbers, here’s one of the greatest of all time.

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Here’s an LSU version for good measure. Geaux Pete!

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P.S. You know that Pelican mascot should be named “Pistol” or “Pete”, right?

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Chris Trew is a New Orleans comedian who recently won “Best New Orleans Comedian on Twitter in the Gambit “Yat Speak” awards. Follow him here. He’s performing Tuesday night (8:30p, Howlin Wolf Den, New Orleans), Wednesday (10:00p, Sidebar, Lafayette), Thursday (8:00p, House of Blues, New Orleans), Friday (11:00p, The Station, Houston) and Saturday (10:00p, North Door, Austin). Trew 2 the Game is a weekly column exclusively on Bourbon Street Shots and a weekly podcast on It’s New Orleans.